Letter To The Editor: A Gift To Self (Because I’m Worth It)

Letter To The Editor: A Gift To Self (Because I’m Worth It)

To User’s News,

I wanted to write and say thankyou for remembering me by sending me the User’s News magazine.

I have been reading you for so long so it is only natural that I wanted to let you know that last month, on my 60th birthday, I gave up Suboxone after 20 years.  Before that it was methadone, heroin, speedballs, pills – all sorts, and of course alcohol and smokes and bongs. I don't even know everything that I've taken.

I am now abstinent. For me, it was like climbing a wall to the sky.

I am shocked with myself.  I do feel the anxiety big time. I know why people find it hard. You have to deal with things like boredom and having feelings I've never felt before which feels strange.  I can not believe how different it is sometimes.  I get scared and think: "Why am I doing this? I'm old any rate". And I find myself listening to those really nasty voices.  But then I tell them sternly to fuck off.  And they do. It's great!

I have started to feel good. I was the kind of person who wouldn't walk out the front door unless I was stoned. 

So I just wanted you to know it doesn't matter the age, whenever you're ready, help will come to you.

Yours sincerely, 

Vivienne

 

Dear Vivienne,

Wow, you’re my new hero! I don’t know what made the difference for you – in fact I would love to tell that story to User’s News readers – but whatever made you decide to focus on your health I salute you.

Many of us spend a lot of time wishing things were different. But it is all too easy for all of us humans – not just the drug taking variety - to find excuses to not take action. And it’s not so easy to take the big breath and just do it. We are often scared of moving in new directions.

So when someone does step up and make those changes – including having the humility to ask for help -  it is very inspirational for all of us.

If you do decide to have a tickle sometime in the future, please remember your tolerance will be very low, so make it a small one and don’t do it alone. Too many of us overdose after a period of abstinence.      

Thanks for allowing NUAA and User’s News to be a part of your journey. It really means a lot to us. We are your community and we respect your choices, no matter what they are. Please know that we are here for you.

And happy birthday from all of us here at NUAA!

Love Leah xx

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